Life, Parenting And Relationships

Cats In The Cradle

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You are Born into this World to one who carries the Title of Mother, with the definition of loving, adept in caring and the most ferocious protector. A True Mother possess the utmost ability For nuturing, the best of Dads only comes close. For eleven years she never gave you any indication that your perception of her was misconceived. Then one Day she developed a bad case of the Breeze, and like a gust of wind she is gone. I have stated before abandoning your children is an awful trait that many Men possess. When Women do It that’s a whole different Animal. Mothers have a great propensity for caring and nurturing. So when a Woman abandons two young Daughters she is not a Mother, only a Baby maker. It was nothing you did or didn’t do.

Dad was the most loving and caring Man, he was a great provider. Again it was nothing he did or didn’t do. Mom wasn’t a true Mother, a true Mother does not fly away and leave two Daughters for a Man who doesn’t care about her Children. This is a true story told to me by a Coworker. When he learned that I wrote Blogs, he asked me what do I write about, I told him Parenting and Relationships. He said Tony do I have a Blog for you. At first we decided to call the Blog The Librarian, due to the fact that after ten lonely years of caring for his Daughters, always looking for someone who cared for them also and not just him.

One day he met a Woman who was a Librarian and Married her. Someone to help him  finish the Job of raising two Daughters after their Mother abandoned the Family for a younger more attractive and sexier Man, someone to satisfy her raging Harmones. I guess that was a good enough reason to run off and leave two young Daughters for a Man to raise and teach them the things only a Mother can. His Story broke my Heart. I decided to name the Blog Stand Up Dad. Because for ten years that is exactly what he did for two Rebellious little Brats, they treated him as if it was his fault why their no good horny Mother ran off and left them to raise themselves, if not for the dedication of a loving Father.

Did I mention that People Bites. A lot of Men in their prime would have dropped them off at a Relative’s House and never looked back. Not my friend he was a stand up Guy who embraced his Responsibilities. The bad part was that he went above and beyond what a good Dad is supposed to be. He put them both through College, making their lives easier he bought them a Condo so they didn’t have to live in a Dorm. Talking about Low Life people these two Girls Graduated College, neither of them possessed not one Gram of ambition. Unilaterally they decided to move back Home and live off the Old Man, instead of putting their Education to good use and Forge their own way in Life. You can take some People to River’s Edge, making them drink is another Story.

You live as long as I have lived and you think you’ve heard it all. Sometimes I think that telling the Stories of the People I have known is my only motivation for Writing. He told me that these two Minions did their best to break up his Marriage. They didn’t want that Woman in what they considered their House. There is no doubt in my Mind that if he was in a Debilitating condition and needed their help, they would not be living there. These were not loving caring People, they were selfish, greedy and malicious. They wanted her out of the Will. John Legend puts it Best, who do we think we are. It absolutely Gauls me, When miserable little people who think nothing of ruining other People’s Lives, when theirs is in a Portable Toilet. They resented the Woman who tried to fill the void their Mother created in their lives, it’s like they had an Ax to grind for every Parent Figure. They disrespected their Father and his Wife, yet they didn’t have the mind of a Flea to know that after you have sucked the last drop of Blood it’s time to move on.

The confrontations even got to the point where he had the Cops removed them from his Home. Yet the soft Hearted slob allowed them to return to continue spreading misery and the bitterness that was  inside of them. Makes you wonder how do we come by Our Genetic composition. They were 100% their Mother’s offspring, they were Cold Hearted People, just like the one who abandoned them. There was nothing in them that resembled their Father, a loving caring Man.  I have spent a Lifetime trying to figure out what makes people Tick, what drives them to be inhumane to the ones who loved them. I don’t wish evil on good People. For these two blowing their Fertile years waiting for the Old Man’s Money. I see two Krones looking out the Mansion’s Window, realizing that they went too far. Oftentimes I wonder how do they Reconcile with their God, or do they Acknowledge Him. So in this late stage in Life I have come to the conclusion that we are all born with our own Minions. How we deal with them and whether we let them Dictate our Lives Define who we are, Divine Creatures or Children of the Corn.

P.S. in the end he lost his Job because the situation at Home consumed his every Thought, he was unable to function at work.

P.P.S. If Thy right Hand offends Thee cut it off.

Life, Parenting And Relationships


For thirty seven years every time a sex scandal breaks, all I ever heard from my Wife is Men are dogs. Even though I know she wasn’t referring to me. One thing she always said to me is that I was going to Hell for holding a grudge. Many a Days when she made me mad, I would crawl in bed, turn my Back to her and snored like a Bear, even if she was in her Birthday Suit and smelling like a Flower. That is what a real Man do, he does not put his Pride in his back Pocket, he does not abandon his conviction,  compromise his Ideals, sell his Soul, throw away everything, lose his Mind or his Career for a little Piece. And there you have it, the motivation for this Blog.

My first experience to Men who would throw it all away for a moment pleasure came when I was fourteen. Someone of great trust a pillar of the Community, a Teacher, tried to Rape me across the Street from a Police Precinct. If I had screamed the Cops would heard me loud and clear hollering Rape. The poor Dumb Rapist did not do his Homework, otherwise he would have known that I had a reputation of kicking Asses of people much older than I was. All for a piece of Ass he carried my souvenir for the rest of his Life, a Glass Eye. I Nailed him so hard in his Eye it almost fell out of the Socket and hit the Floor. I am pretty sure the Cops heard him screaming like a little Girl. That’s what you get when you stretch your Loins instead of your Mind.

Not long after that I kept hearing Rumors of Altar Boys being Molested and Raped by Priests I was still fourteen. I thought to myself maybe I needed to get a Gun to protect myself from the People who were supposed to Protect me. Three months away from fifteen I became friends with a twelve years old Catholic School Attendee, that Boy had access to more Marijuana than many Dealers, his Brother was one. Many days after School when we should be Home doing our Homework, we sat in the Schoolyard smoking some of the most Potent Strains , exchanging Stories of Molestation that went all the way up to the Bishop. No wonder that at twelve and fourteen our Heads were all screwed up smoking Marijuana trying to make sense of the Madness.

We were both deep into Music Jethro Thul’s Aqualong was one of our favorite, our favorite verse, eyeing little Girls in baggy Pants. Need I say more, we were being corrupted by Our Society. A few years later two Brothers the Timmins Brothers both sixteen years old were Arrested for a string of Rapes, probably twelve. All perpetrated on Seniors, Women old enough to be their Great Grandmothers. The World that we were coming into was unraveling in front of our Eyes. Sex was now more important than Morality and everything else. Sodom and Gomorrah had resurged. And still have not gone away. Over the years stories of Infants, Adolescents, Teenagers and grown Women being Molested an Raped has made it to Epidemic status.

Which takes me back thirty seven years when I first heard my Wife saying that men are Dogs. At this point in my Life I beg to disagree, they are Primates- Cro-magnon, still wearing Loincloth hunched over. When your primitive Sex drive outweighs all, including your freedom, your Career and your Dignity calling you a Dog is an insult to Man’s Best Friend. Which makes me ask the question is Testosterone the Driving force of Life? It has been speculated that Cain killed his Brother over a Woman, Countries gone to War, Kings Abdicating their Thrones, Rich Men giving up Fortunes, over a Woman. My English Literature Teacher’s words resonates in my Head ” what is the Author not saying” it’s not a Woman it’s the Itch.

Failure to control the Itch has made Monkeys out of many Great Men. Judges, Doctors, Presidents, Bishops, Clergymen, CEOs, Teachers, Actors, Comedians, Television Personalities, Fathers and young Boys. Many are sitting in Prisons because they acted like Dogs in Heat. They lost their freedom and everything all because they never heard of a cold Shower, now they are showering with big Burly Men who take what they want, even if you are only eighteen and a Virgin. Two years ago in Tampa, a young man of seventeen was Arrested and Convicted of two Rapes. He raped his first victim when he was sixteen, the victim was sixty. Barely seventeen he attacked his second victim, she was seventeen and College Bound with great aspirations.

He gave her such a severe beating she is now in a Vegetative state unable to speak or eat. May God help us all for what we’ve become, Chimpanzees in Heat. My Wife is an Avid Reader, she finds Stories that doesn’t make Mainstream Media. The other day she informed me that one of my favorite Personalities was Raped by her Dad a Minister. She was in her early Teens when her own Father Impregnated her. Again we are back in the Caves, your Granddaughter is your Daughter, Deliverance all over again. Since we are nothing but Barbarians at least one Custom should still be in our Penal Code, Castration.

Although I have written in many Blogs that you can’t always blame Society and the Parents for all your mal-adjustments. At this late stage in Life I am developing inward conflicts of those Beliefs. The Media sells Sex as if it was more important than Food, Kids barely sixteen becoming Parents, not mature enough to guide themselves, what can you expect from their Offsprings. For instance when I was thirteen a fifteen years old Nymphomaniac lined up four other Boys and myself and introduced us to Sex. I am beginning to convince myself that it is a Parenting issue. Although The Media doesn’t help being Manipulative and Suggestive. When I was younger I used to think that the Moral Majority was Intrusive and Overbearing, all that has changed with the aforementioned. Without Morality we are back in the Caves Naked and without a Candle.

Life, Parenting And Relationships

Self Analysis




The Bible says “to thine own self be true”

Yet the average Person lives in a Bubble of Deception and Denial. Sometimes it even makes us ill causing Psychosis and Delusions. Sometimes we ends up on someone’s Couch shelling out over one hundred dollars an hour for someone to tell us to look deep inside our self and we will find the Root of our problem.

I would bet my Life that there is a great disproportionate number of people who have never thought about self Analysis. They go through one bad experience after another and they blame it on Bad Luck. One bad Relationship after another still blaming Luck, I don’t remember where I’ve heard it ” you make your own Luck”.The reason for that is that complacency rules the average person’s life, changes are not easy, it is way more easy to accept mediocrity and status quo than to take a long hard look at my Life.




At eighteen I read a Book I am not certain that it was Think And Grow Rich, or The Greatest Salesman the Book not only spoke of Financial Gains, but also enriching your day to day Life. In one Chapter it encourages Self Analysis, that chapter changed my entire Life. I took a sheet of paper, drew lines with Headings, I listed my weaknesses and strong points and the changes I would like to happen. At that point in my Life I was on the Axis of becoming Notorious or following my Mother’s Christian Teachings. She told me that Money wasn’t everything, also it was important to have a restful night’s sleep, not ducking under my Bed every time I heard a Car backfired or someone knocking at the Door.




That Book thought me how to have a successful rewarding life without lots of Money and a Flourishing Relationship with everyone, all from taking Analysis of myself. During the same period I remember reading about this Actor who was Married numerous times, six or seven times, all ended with Divorces, each time he blamed the Women. People like that are pathetic, even when you catch them with the smoking Gun, they will blame someone else. When they look in the Mirror they don’t see Mr Hyde, they see Mr Wonderful. I grew up with someone like that,  he should have been the inspiration for this Blog. If he is caught red-handed he would rather shed Crocodile Tears than to fess-up, making you feel guilty for accusing him of something you know for a fact that he did it.




People like that are good Actors on a Stage of Deception, Bad Actors on the Stage of Life. My Mother would say that someone like that has the Devil in them. I have been Married for thirty seven years and if I hadn’t done a self Analysis at eighteen I would have been Divorced thirty seven times. During my self Analysis I found out that I was self centered, manipulative and self-gratifying. What horrible Traits to bring to the Table of Marriage. By the time I got Married at thirty I had Abolished the old Me, I was the Ideal Candidate for Marriage. I was receptive of others feelings, there was no I in Team and I never forced anyone to do what they didn’t want to do.




Now here I am thirty seven years later daring you to self Analize yourself before you are on someone’s Couch bearing your Soul for one Hundred and seven Dollars per Hour and blaming everyone else from Mom to Society. Over the years I have learned that not only Drugs and Alcohol are Addictive, Sex also can Rule your Life. I met Jerry when I was sixteen he was eighteen, he was physically gifted and more Handsome than his Dad who thought he was too good for one Woman,  he abandoned the Family to Pollinate every flower in the Garden. His young Son absorbed his Values, Jerry was the envy of our tightly knit group of Teenagers, his conquests were unbelievable to the point of gratifying Mother and Daughter at eighteen.




Self Analysis was not in his Curriculums, he had not noticed that he was his Father’s Son. When he got Married to another childhood friend of mine I put Welts on my Back for not telling her what she had gotten herself into. I hoped desperately  that the Zebra’s stripes had fade, that was very naive of me. He treated her the same way his Father treated his Mother, a Woman in every State. Oftentimes I asked myself why would he want to live his Father’s Life instead of his own. The relationship was so bad, always arguing and fighting in front of his six years old Son, one Day I witness the Child slapping his Mother’s Face with all his might, I wondered where did he get that from.




Its been forty five years that I have seen that family, in my Mind’s Eye I see the Child carrying on his Grandfather’s Legacy, if he never conducted his own self Analysis. I must tell you Guys that if I hadn’t lived such a Colourful Life and had not pay attention to the People I grew up with I would have nothing to write about, my Imagination is not that Vivid. Anyway we are talking about self Analysis by taking stock of myself I was able to grow Rich in Life, Love and Happiness. I wish that I could say the same for Leona,  during the summer break of seventy one I worked for her Father in his inherited Business that’s where I met her, she was a pampered Child. When she got her license she was sixteen going on seventeen, her Parents gave her a Brand New Cadillac. She was raised to worship Money. When it came time to Marry she passed up Love for the Love of Money. She married a Millionaire with bad Temperaments, someone who needed Professional Analysis. Whenever he returned from Vegas a looser she was the recipient of his wrath. Broken Bones weren’t uncommon, while her Kids behind walls with Ears witnessed their Parent’s shame, molding and shaping their own future Life. Parting Words ” just do it”.