Life

The Little Man Inside

As I sat pondering if am I going to write anything today the inner person (your better Judgement, your Conscience) responded quickly, yes you are, you always have a Story to tell. Austin Powers had Minnie Me, I have Major Me. You’ve heard of the little Man inside you, the same one that makes you do stupid things that sometimes land you in Jail or even get you killed. Well guess what there is also a major Man inside that have made many People do Amazing things. I have always been amazed by Life’s Adventures and wonderment, and things that makes you scratch your Head with amazement,no matter how small. For instance, a young Man turning down a chance to play in the NFL, to be with his ailing Mother.

God Bless his Soul, my Brother- in Law. If ever I have seen an act of selflessness this is major. I have spent a weekend in his Home and I can tell you he is truly Blessed. Not playing for the NFL didn’t hold him back. I have been a People Watcher since I was four years old, that’s how I learned. One Saturday Night’s party at the House almost delivered me Dead to the Emergency Room. Watching the People sip on their Drinks, when they got up to Dance, I covered the Room and emptied every Glass. The Doctors were amazed that a four years old Body could survive what should kill an Adult. Over the years I have dodged the Bullet so many times that I have no choice but to be Reverent and Humble. Humility is an Awesome Experience, I first learned Humility at twenty seven.

While working for Solomon Brothers Brokerage Inc, standing in one of the Elevator Banks at One New York Plaza a Crowd gathered. I noticed that the center of attention was John Gutfreund, (King of Wall Street)CEO and Managing Director. All the Underlings were paying Homage, He smiled but said nothing to no one. The Elevator loaded, I allowed the Wigs to Board first. Last one in I was happy to turn my Back, giving them privacy. From the Group someone taps me on the Shoulder, I turned around and Mr Gutfreund said good morning young Man. I was Devastated with embarrassment that I didn’t say Good Morning first, but he was in the presences of other Directors. I didn’t think it was my place to Address the Managing Director. Does anyone see the Humility, he didn’t say Good Morning to any of the Directors, but he spoke to me. Jesus’s Disciples wanted to wash his Feet, He instead washed their’s.

The most Impressive thing about John was his Humility and Respect, despite receiving twelve Millionn Bonus above his Salary. I was further Humbled when he requested me, on the bottom rung of his Internal Security Department to Guard his Valuables, while his forty seven Million Apartment was being Renovated. There were Ming Dynasty figurine worth Millions all over the Place. As soon as I entered the Apartment I began inventory. My Job was to see that all the Contractors know that they were being watched. The Trust that he Bestowed on me was Humbling. From then on I was a changed Person who looked down on no one and thought myself to be above no one. Treat the Janitor with the same respect you give the President. I was further Humbled twenty one years later,  after leaving Solomon Brothers because they turned down my request to transfer to One World Center.

As I watched the Buildings Collapsed a Chill came over me when I thought to myself, I should have been in that Building. When they turned down my request for transferring into that Building, my Mother said to me, God Does everything for a Reason. Solomon lost nine Hundred Employees. I am always vigilant of Amazing occurrences. If they had not turned down my request, I had planned to Retire with the Company. I wouldn’t even touch that with the Man inside making the decision to quit, that was Devine Intervention. I once was Blind, that was my moment of clarity, coming full circle with my Life. 9/11 changed my life forever, before that fateful day I always wondered what was my purpose on this Earth.

Several years later while working in a Nursing Home I realized that my purpose was to give as much of myself to others till it hurts. I went out of my way to make their last Days on this Earth as pleasant and joyful as can be. I never knew that I had a voice until I filled the Hallways with Songs that brought them to their Doors.It was there I met this Woman, she was a Concert Pianist who was stricken with Dementia at the height of her Career, fifty years old.The colors of the Ivory and the Notes were shaded by the Scabbing of her Brain. She was non responsive and had to be fed. The Nursing staff treated her as if she was inanimate. From day one I started communicating with her, her Eyes were intent with mine, even though she never said a word. That never made me give up on her, she started warming up to me by following me with her Eyes whenever I entered her Room.

I told her jokes until I got her to first smile and eventually laughing out loud. It wasn’t long after that she was feeding herself and was back among the Living. God bless you Gladys for allowing me to give of you myself. I learned all about Dementia from Dealing with my Mother’s Dementia. I visited her seven days a week and communicated with her as if she was all there. She showered me with Praise and told me that I was the high point of her Day. Once again the little Man inside me was Humbled. Most people treats Dementia Patients as if their lights were on and nobody was Home. Even in Comatose Patients there is always that little Man in there. Sometimes if you reach far enough, you can bring them out of the Storm. When I was seventeen I used to hear enlightened People talking about finding yourself. I am proud to say my Life wasn’t an absolute waste, “

” I found myself along the way. I found out that Life is Bigger than you or I, that’s me in the Corner and I am not losing my Religion.

The Top Attorney in my Town said ” At my Age I believe I can say what I think”. Ditto.

Life

Lessons Learned in Life50 Timeless Pieces Of Advice About Love & Relationships. – Lessons Learned in Life

https://lessonslearnedinlife.com/50-timeless-pieces-advice-love-relationships-2/

 

 

Excerpts  from one of my old Blog

While working one Summer for Her Dad in his Hardware Business. That’s where I met Cindy. On her sixteenth Birthday she was given a New Cadillac. Twenty she Married a Millionaire, he was a Gambler, when he lost he would beat Her where the Children Listened. The Blog is called Root of Evil. I should have called the Blog ” you’ve got to know when to hold Em.

Life, Parenting And Relationships

Taking Control

Taking Control

Working in a Justice System has been a true revaluation for me, of the importance of good Parenting. The other day I was sitting in the parking Lot, directly across the Street was a sprawling Building. This Building was the Juvenile Detention Center. While sitting there looking at the tiny Windows, I wondered to myself how old was its youngest Resident. I also wondered if by the time he made it back home would he have been rehabilitated or at least seen the Light or the evil of his way. It was then that it occurred to me the importance of good Parenting. The importance of bending the Twig before it grows into a thorny Tree is of Tantamount Effect. Junior was only eighteen Months old when he decided to test his will and witts against mine.

Sitting in his Highchair throwing a Fit, he tossed his spoon on the Floor several times. Unwittingly I picked it up each time, washed it and put it in the Bowl. After several times of repeating this game I removed him from his Highchair and placed him on the Floor next to the discarded Spoon. This was his first lesson that he wasn’t going to have things his way all the time. By you picking up that Spoon for the twentieth time, controlling and manipulation is now one of his Trait that could lead him to the Detention Center. They come here from every socio economic structure imaginable. I remember when I started Blogging one of my Boss asked me what I Blogged about. I told him among many things, problematic Teens were one of my main interest. He visited my Website and browse some of the Articles. The next day he saw me he congratulated me on my insights. He told me that he had a Teenager at home that was heading down the wrong Road. This guy was the Director of Marketing for a Company that made over one Hundred Million that year. I am quite certain that he was properly compensated. His kid had no reason to be a Rebel without a Clue, yet he was. Two years later I am now working in the County Justice System and here was my ex Boss making an appearance with his Kid.

As I mentioned earlier, they come from all walks of Life many times it starts with dropping the Spoon, by you not laying early ground rules, setting Boundaries and limitations. You are not preparing them for Society. Society is a Tangled weave of Laws, you can get arrested for spitting on the Ground, so what of the other thousand of infractions. If they can’t or won’t abide by your Rules what makes you think that they will abide by the Laws of our Legal System. My Mother was a hard working Christian Woman, yet at fourteen I Dreamed of being a Thug. I was only fourteen when she found an ounce of high grade Marijuana in my Pocket while doing the Laundry.

She gave me the option of a Cot in a Juvenile Detention Center or changing the Road I was Traveling. That tough Love navigated the rest of my Life. With one Arrest and conviction I could not be Working in the Justice System. When my Mother was laying down the Laws, how was I supposed to know that she was looking out for my future. As a Parent by you not laying down laws and rules while you are still in control you are paving the way for future court appearances, and Jail time. Your Kid may be the smartest and most talented kid in the World, If you don’t teach them Humility and let them know that there are Boundaries and consequences in Life. Society will chew them up and spit them out in the Justice Systems. Look at O.J, look at Arron Hernandez, he made it to the top of his Game along the way his Parents never told him that he could not get away with Murder. A wise Man once wrote ” it is better to build Boys than to mend  Men”

Here are excerpts from the Book Parenting Teens with Love and Logic.

Who’s in Charge Here?

For years, Ryan had appeared headed for a life of irresponsibility. He lived like a slob and had increasingly resisted his Parent’s badgering about his sloppy appearance, grungy clothes, messy room and that”infernal music” thudding through the walls. At thirteen Ryan simply”forgot” to do his chores. The older he grew, the more defiant he became. At seventeen, he started drinking even on school nights and experimenting with drugs, both of which were murder on his grades. He went out with girls running with the wrong Crowd, such as Desiree, telling his Dad, “she comes from a broken home and needs me as a counselor”, prompting his Dad to counter sarcastically, ” Just what kind of counseling techniques are you using”.

Ryan had long since blown off the hallowed family tradition of kissing his parents good-night. Now they were lucky if he just yelled through their master bedroom door, “I’am home. Allan responded to Ryan’s moral slide by losing his temper and yelling. Or “you have the social traits of a bum!” Sandy would mutter aloud, “I know this is a Kid I wouldn’t take off the shelf myself”. Ryan, of course, just sneered. He had his Parents emotionally eating out of his hand, and he knew it. They knew it too. But they felt helpless to reassert control. Then Alan and Sandy attended a seminar that introduced them to the Love and Logic parenting approach. They learned that parents should take care of themselves first, let their children own their own problems, and allow them to live with the consequences of their decisions.

P.S.  It is better to take control as early as possible than waiting till they are heading for the Detention Center.